Move Aside Dos Equis Man: It’s the Most Interesting Best Friend in the World

He is a man rich in stories and experiences. The most interesting best friend in the world believes life should be lived – well – interestingly.

• His scorecard on a round of golf reads simply – 18.
• And thus, he, himself, coined the phrase – “tee to green.”
• For every season since its inception, “The Bachelor” has courted his greatness, yet he is consistently otherwise detained.
• In a game of ping-pong, he scores immediately after “ping.”
• His pristine Bermuda grass lawn is imported – from Bermuda.
• He’s been named “Mr. Buffalo Island” for 46 consecutive years.
• When on a low-carb diet, he actually consumes “negative”carbs.
• Flip any coin in his expansive collection, and it always comes up “heads.” His head, of course.
• In a friendly game of black jack, dealers graciously invite him to “triple-down.”
• As for his 1-a-day vitamin regimen. He’s taken only one vitamin – Ever.
• Out of respect, Tornado Alley takes a detour around his hometown.
• His vocabulary exceeds that of Merriam Webster.
• Few people know this. Very few. Dos Equis called him first to represent their product. He cordially responded with a polite, “Thank you. But no.”
• He owns a fleet of cocker spaniels to groom HIS golden locks.
• He was strongly courted to light the torch of the XXX Olympiad, yet fire fears him.

Stay thirsty, my friends.

(Bloggers note: A tribute to my best friend, Brady Cornish. Sitting around thinking up garbage like this is some of the most fun we have together. Seriously, he’s the best friend a man could have. I’d cut my heart out for him if he needed it. )